


Strained Negotiations

by minkhollow



Category: Harry Potter - Rowling, Warehouse 13
Genre: Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-10-06
Updated: 2009-10-06
Packaged: 2017-10-02 12:39:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minkhollow/pseuds/minkhollow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dumbledore goes to America seeking to reclaim an important artifact in the fight against Voldemort.  It doesn't go quite as smoothly as he would have hoped.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I got to thinking, and... well, this was a natural extrapolation of the Warehouse, in its way. AU for Potterverse, as dictated by the setup; for Warehouse 13 canon, this is happening not long after McNuttyPants goes rogue.  
> I am neither JKR nor SciFi; I just borrow for the fun of it.

“No. Absolutely not. It isn’t happening.”

“My good man, you cannot possibly know the gravity of the situation--”

“Oh, yes, I _can_. You waltz in here and expect me to go dig something out of the Dark Vault - which, by the way, has its name for a _very good reason_ \- and hand it over to you so you can do God only _knows_ what with it. Not gonna happen. And don’t even think about pointing that wand at me, it’s not gonna do you any good.”

Albus sighs; he hadn’t thought this would prove so difficult. “Would it help, at all, if I told you I only intend to destroy it?”

“Not really, no. But you _can_ tell me why you think it’s so important. Which also won’t help you leave with it, but I should know and it might make you feel better.”

“That locket is instrumental in keeping a very dangerous man tied to this world.”

The man who had answered the door of the warehouse eyes Albus over the top of his glasses. “And that’s nothing the guy who _brought_ it here didn’t tell me,” he says. “How do you think it ended up in the Dark Vault in the first place? Besides, if the neutralizer’s doing what it should, and there’s absolutely no reason it wouldn’t be, your bad guy can’t draw from it. It is _not_ leaving the Warehouse.”

“I assure you, this is a very desperate situation indeed. The locket needs to be destroyed, not simply neutralized. If I cannot dispose of it soon, I can keep it well maintained until such time as I have the means.”

“That’s what I’m worried about. No one’s ever been able to find the wizards’ sector of Warehouse 12 - for all I know, you’re just planning to shove it in there without the proper oversight. Here, I know it’s in exactly the kind of storage it needs to be.”

Albus blinks. “I would keep watch over it myself, not simply store it in some warehouse.”

“Even better. How would you do that, _wear_ it? At least the guy who brought it here knew it needed more help than he could give it. What makes you so sure you know better, I don’t know, but you’re not being very convincing.”

“May I ask who entrusted it to your care?”

The other man shrugs. “Never gave his name, and I didn’t ask for it. He said he’d removed it from its hiding place, and then left England in something of a hurry. When he couldn’t take care of it himself, he came here. Which is exactly what he _should_ have done. I don’t ask how wizards hear about the Warehouse, I just take care of business and get them on their way.”

Albus does his best to ignore the overtones of suspicion in the other man’s voice. He has every confidence he can convince the man in time. “The fact remains that the locket needs to be destroyed. It could well be vital to the future well-being of the world.”

“You could say the same for just about anything _in_ here. If it worries you that much, I’ve got some acid I can drop it in. Formula devised by Isaac Newton, it eats through everything but the neutralizer - anyway. That’s the best I can give you, and I _told_ you not to point that wand at me, _stop_ it. It wouldn’t do you any good anyway. You cast a spell at someone who’s inside the Warehouse, and you’ll only be facing your worst nightmare.”

“I like to think I’ve already done that, in my lifetime.”

The other man shakes his head, looking like he’s trying to restrain a laugh. “Most people do. But I’ve seen some of your monsters, and none of them are anywhere _near_ as terrifying as Mrs. Frederic. So. You can take my word for it and get out of here, or you can not take my word for it and someone _else_ will get you out of here. I really don’t recommend that option.”

Albus sighs. “I suppose I have no choice. Rest assured, I intend to see that the deed has been done.”

“You can do that to your heart’s content, but it’s not leaving the Warehouse. Things aren’t _supposed_ to, once they come in.”

Albus is very highly dissatisfied, upon leaving South Dakota. He would have liked to be more certain that the matter would be seen to, but the infuriating man did have a point; aside from the matter of government entanglements, which are always more troublesome in America, Warehouses hold a jurisdiction unto themselves.

And rumor suggests that they do not fear wizards.

He gives it some time before attempting to follow through; when he does, there is no trace that the locket was ever in America. Under the circumstances, he supposes he can hope for little else.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Artie has never liked wizards much. Dumbledore's timing and attitude have done less than nothing to change his opinion.

Artie’s never liked wizards very much, and that pompous ass did nothing to improve his opinion. They have a way of assuming they know better than everyone - sometimes each other, even, which just makes Artie wonder how they ever get anything _done_ \- and that there’s no such thing as a way to do something without magic.

Not to mention all the stories about their private sector of Warehouse 12, which wasn’t connected to the normal Warehouse and is still at large as far as the Regents know. It’s not the kind of thing that inspires confidence. And to top it all off, the guy had possibly the worst timing in the _world_ to be asking for the release of an Artifact, considering... well.

But Artie’s not thinking about that.

He knows more about the kid who brought the locket in than he let on, even though he couldn’t get as thorough of a background check as he would’ve liked (damn Ministry of Magic stonewalled him at every turn). It was enough to tell him that if the kid thought the locket needed to be out in the open and/or used, he probably would’ve left it wherever the guy who made it had it stashed. But he wasn’t about to tell today’s guy any of that - it probably would’ve had him hanging around for another hour or so, and Artie doesn’t have time for that.

Mrs. Frederic is dubious about destroying an Artifact with so little word as to its origin, but she’s even more dubious about sitting through the Ministry’s stonewalling in pursuit of more information, or giving the guy who wanted the thing let out the chance to come back to the Warehouse. So she bends the Regents around on the matter - Artie doesn’t even want to _ask_ how much work that took - and signs off on the appropriate paperwork.

It’s delicate work, dropping something that nasty into a vat of acid that eats through everything but the neutralizer - and all without leaving the Dark Vault, which is marginally better than having to carry the thing around the Warehouse, but it does present its own dangers - but Artie’s not new to the job anymore. Just because it still surprises him every now and then doesn’t mean he can’t find his way through a little Artifact destruction.

He’d wondered, not long after he started working in the Warehouse, just how much of a job they’d all have without wizards. It didn’t take long for him to find out that there’s a lot of stuff the Warehouse deals with that even wizards don’t know how to explain. Not that they like to admit it, if the Warehouse 12 debacle is any indication, but the point stands.

And it might be incredibly petty, but there’s a certain satisfaction in watching the locket dissolve. That’s one person who probably won’t be back to bother them, at least.


End file.
